cross eyed one liners

Well, the look on the customer's face was priceless. How come you can you never borrow a few quid from a leprechaun? They say money talks but mine can only say goodbye. It can affect either one or both eyes. He had a-stick-matism from then on. Its not that funny, but its super funny. I guess he's an Opthemallogist. Related reads:See our guides to the best Irish toasts for drinks, weddings and more. Anto and his wife were lying in bed in their house in Dublin one Saturday morning. You're not the first to reject me! Why didn't the eyes like wearing any glasses? 107. Yo mama's so cross-eyed, she has to sit sideways at the movie theater. 109. Why do army snipers close one eye while shooting? This is one of the many Irish stereotype jokes that's flying around, but unlike many it isn't exactly offensive. Funny One-Liners 1. Probably because they are all very eye-tech. 57. Eyes cream. We could never see eye-to-eye. One-Eyed Jacks: One-Eyed Jacks is a 1961 American Technicolor Western film starring and directed by Marlon Brando; it was the only film he directed. Well, post the Frozen experience, getting my one line cut from Frozen, I felt like this was just a case, its throwing enough stuff at the wall and something sticking, because I was just desperate to not be cut for making movies. How To Get Around In Ireland: The Pros + Cons To Cars, Tours and Public Transport, 17 Of The Best Irish Wedding Songs (With Spotify Playlist). 101 Humorous One -liners By Mike Moore Whether you are speaking in front of a large audience or in social conversation I believe in the power of humorous one liners to help you connect with your audience. Yes, I would like to receive emails from The Positive MOM. Two blondes are walking down the road when one says "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says "Where?" One Liners and Short Jokes Why do army snipers close one eye while shooting? He regretted it in Heinzsight. Yes, this is another potentially offensive and dirty Irish joke involving sheep. 30. Because he told her, "Eyelash out whenever Eye'm mad. I found out she was seeing someone on the side. ", "Denise actually, I quite like that. You look 'armless! Everything that you see wants to kill you, and can. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Exhaustion can also make your eyes cross, among other things. Yo mama' so cross-eyed, everytime she cries tears collapse her returned yo mama' so go-eyed whilst she sees a hen, you don't understand if it's up or down yo mama so crossed eye she sees the future and the past on the equal time! It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it, you're adding raisins and marshmallows. Because if they closed both eyes they wouldn't be able to see. He said, "Well, it's okay. 5. 42. Between you and I, something smells. So an Irish woman gives birth to twins, a boy and a girl. Funny PJ jokes & pj questions and answers Check your banana quotient: 1. Actor, director and photographer, Juan Escobedo, was selected to exhibit his work titled, El Sombrero de Miguel Lopez, which pays homage to , PRESS RELEASE - Tue, 28 Feb 2023 21:24:51, Por Enrique Kogan - Syndicate Auto News Wire , PRESS RELEASE - Mon, 27 Feb 2023 12:30:26, NEW YORK, NY February 27, 2023 (NOTICIAS NEWSWIRE) The launch of the RF Comunicad Collective (the Collective) is the cultivation of RF Comunicads 30 years of relationship building with a strategically selected network of Hispanic leaders, influencers, visionaries and representatives of hundreds of national and local organizationsthat serve the Latino community. Below, youll find a handful of clean Irish jokes. 11. Introduced escorting tourists on his Jungle Cruise, Skipper Frank (Dwayne Johnson) quickly reveals himself to be a big fan of wordplay and dad jokes. Youre both my world. McGregor Houghton. What would you call a fish that didn't have any eyes? ", 23. Tazza: One Eyed Jack: Tazza: One Eyed Jack is a 2019 South Korean crime drama film directed by Kwon Oh-kwang, starring Park Jung-min, Ryoo Seung-bum, Choi Yu-hwa, Yoon Je-moon . Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: bonquiquithe1st, trenewman94, bettysuee23. What an amazing opportunity! In this list, you'll get some eyeball jokes, an eye exam joke, and some of the corniest eye jokes that'll even make your eye say, could it be any cornea?! 85. 37. Thakela 4. Between you and me something smells. I stir it in with my right, replied the second. Akela 3. It exclaimed, "Eye'm back! What did one eye say to the other? Whats a Heron with only one eye? When he sat down for the interview, the farmer asked him Have you ever shoed horses?, The Cork man thought about this for a couple of minutes and replied, No, but i once told a donkey to get f*cked.. Why did the girl always seem to lose her contact lenses? So we have him locked up. Well, I look forward to disappointing you. These are my top 20 cow jokes. If I ordered a bowl of pasta would you that make me Italian? You might also have: impaired vision. You look 'armless! says the vet. So, he shouted over to the lad digging the holes, I dont get it why do you dig a hole, only for the other lad to fill it in?, The lad wiped his brow and sighed deeply, Well, I suppose it probably does looks a bit odd. Funny one-liner #3549 My cross-eyed wife and I just got a divorce. None that Ive ever agreedto. A: You can at least ignore a blond safely. 48. Sorry, love, can I have a pint of Guinness and a packet of crisps where youre ready there. Tag. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments. Names. "Just because he's cross-eyed?" The choice is yours. After a tense silence, the first one said, "really, now, if you had offered me the first choice, I would have taken the smaller fish!" How can you make someone's eyes twinkle? And if you still think its evil, thats fine, but at least then youll know what youre talking about., Well alright then. "'Cross-Eyed Mary' is a song about another form of low life, but more humorous. Have you heard about the boy who was dating a girl that had lazy eyes? What was the movie they made on the life story of a man who couldn't see properly since childhood? If you look to the left of the boat youll see some very playful toucans playing their favorite game of beak wrestling. cross- 1. going or placed across. It said, "Well, you're looking alright. Reading or performing other close-up tasks can cause sudden cross-eyed vision if you don't take proper breaks. 95. That's a bit of a stretch." "I don't have a girlfriend. What did the eyes say when they finally got the glasses? What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man? Loved reading the jokes. So cross-eyed he could look at his own head. Oh. It'd be eye-ronic. 31. Why are eyes puns not puns? Marty he sighed, Why is it that whenever you ask an Irishman a question, he replies with another question?, Bollocks. I recently heard about a mannequin that lost all of his friends. Well says Ben, If you had what I had youd drink them quickly, too. What did the patient say when the optometrist asked him if he ever had his eyes checked out? Between you and me there's something that smells. What did the cornea tell the Latino eyelashes when they met? He said, "Eye really sclera about you a lot. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Because a bad eye can't What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? 22. What did the judge have to say about a bad eye pun said during the trial? 2. Do you know a funny one liner? Yo mama' so cross-eyed, everytime she cries tears fall down her back Ill leave you behind. The latter requires a keen sense of She made quite a spectacle of herself. They then moved to the next street and did the same, working flat out all day without stopping. ! Well no. And I went on the ride and our skipper made that joke as well, and I cracked. Q: What's the difference between this joke and sex? Credit: Christmas cracker. Ah here, you drank those very quickly said the barman. They both love testing pupils. (Ex: Picture, trash can, door knob) Step 2: Make a triangular hand symbol. iContact. He's a ledge. Thats good says Paddy. Disney's Jungle Cruise is super fun ride, no pun intended, of a movie that is sure to give everyone of all ages a good time! Do they live or do they die? Then the other eye. My girlfriend has lovely colored eyes; I . What do you call an Irishman with a case of chickenpox? It said, "Between you and me, something smells. Any information you provide to us via this website may be placed by us on servers located in countries outside the EU if you do not agree to such placement, do not provide the information. What is the definition of "making love"? Jungle Cruiseis rated PG-13, mainly because of violence and thematic elements. I have three and a half legs, four arms but only two hands, two noses but only one nostril and one eye. Captain.". Why did the teacher decide to quit her job the other day? Dontthinkhesawus. One liner tags: attitude, life, work 72.90 % / 188 votes. Freaky eye-day. Because if they closed both eyes they wouldn't be able to see. Between you and me, something smells. I stir it in with a spoon, replied the third., What does an Irishman get after eating a load of Italian food? 110. She said, "I've had enough of your shenanigans. Two Irish friends went to bar . Fun Fact: The most difficult stunt for Emily Blunt was the vine swing. Why do hunters close one eye when they aim? cruzado, hbrido crossing noun 1. a place where a road etc may be crossed. 59. We need that. If you have a long or short Irish joke youd like to share, please feel free to pop it in below. Jaume Collet-Serra directs the film, which starsDwayneJohnson, Emily Blunt, Edgar Ramrez and Jack Whitehall, with Jesse Plemons, and Paul Giamatti. But a good-eye-might. Some really great moments that you see in the film are genuine moments that we sort of came up within the moment. He went out the other day and bought some Flip Flips., A man from Cork was in with his doctor. It'd be called Piiig. I failed math so many times at school,. An Irishman is going into a pub in the countryside. Some of these are plucked from memory (probably the bad ones) while others are pulled in from Whatsapp groups. How does it feel to wake up every morning? Now, go, sit in the cornea. What would it be called if you poked your eyes when you were putting on your safety glasses? I have no eye deer. 96. 3. 44. OK none of these jokes are going to be overly filthy, because this is a site for all the family. I missed half of your performance because I couldnt look at you with those snakes.. See all one liners sorted from the best by visitors like you. Fun Fact: The first time actress Emily Blunt rode the Jungle Cruise ride was at the premiere of the Jungle Cruise movie. Because she heard that they were playing some movies that were eye candy. ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. Well, you just shine some light in their eye. Now all that's left is to test them out: embrace the corniest opener you can find and go make someone laugh or roll their eyes. What kind of vision do all the sanitation workers have? Top . Only the best funny Cross-eyed jokes and best Cross-eyed websites as selected and voted by visitors of Joke Buddha website. A fsh. It gives them eye-fives. If a man holds a bee in his hand, what does he have in his eye? What would you call the eye, which has the ability to fly? But, if such a sad instance occurs and you couldn't find your favorite one-liner included in our list, add it in the comments section. $3.99 a minute. Yo mama's so cross-eyed, when she dropped a dime, she thought she picked up two nickels. 84. Enjoy. I get to make a choice, and I choose to rest. When the barman arrived back with the pint, all of the shots of whiskey had been drunk. But a good eye might, What do you call a deer with one eye? Look, David. Because she thought that it was the ideal eye deal. It's about a schoolgirl prostitute but not in such coarse terms. He said, "I've been framed, sir.". No, the man replied. This condition is usually treated with glasses, but may also require eye patching and/or surgery on the muscles of one or both eyes. ", 20. the vet tells them he can fix it but for $500 the polocks agree. We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! What do you call a kid with one leg, one eye, one arm, asthma and tons of acne? I get paid by the number of people I take out, not by the number of people I bring back. What is the banana listening to it called ? How do government employees wink when they're at work? Miscellaneous Eyes Other expressions. He said, "I did not see that one coming.". She was cross-eyed. Funny Jokes . Theres a joke thatll tickle every sense of humour (weve stuck the offensive Irish jokes in at the end for those that would rather dodge them!). What makes our eyes feel quite lonely? We hope you love our recommendations for products and services! Between you and me, something smells. He pushed it so far every time to try and make me laugh on that vine swing. What do you call a dinosaur with one eye Because she had a high eye-Q. Well, he saw it with his eyes. Best One Liners 1. Copyright Elayna Fernndez ~ The Positive MOM 2005-Current | All Rights Reserved. I havent been feeling myself lately, Sheamus replied. Because he always wanted a 2020 vision. If youre looking for some funny Irish jokes, the ones below should give you a giggle! Subscribe for virtual tools, STEM-inspired play, creative tips and more. It's amazing how one letter can change the whole meaning of a word, I once introduced myself as a racist, obviously meaning rapist. Well, still, the police managed to close the lid on it. Has anyone ever ghosted you for real before? After five years your job will still suck. cross-eyed adjective uk / krsad / us / krsad / having eyes that look in towards the nose SMART Vocabulary: related words and phrases Eyesight, glasses & lenses accommodative afterimage age-related macular degeneration AMD astigmatic bespectacled bifocals boss-eyed eyestrain goggles macular degeneration monocular multifocal naked Your privacy is important to us. Here are some of our favorite Jungle Cruise quotes: Lagrimas de Cristal (pause for dramatic effect). Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. And says "Oi! 19. Do you know the doctor who has an office at the shopping mall? What did the husband optometrist say to his wife? The rocks you see here in the river are sandstone, but some people just take them for granite. We recognise that not all activities and ideas are appropriate and suitable for all children and families or in all circumstances. God. I asked her why she drew the eyebrows that high and she seems surprised! Sign me up! Two lads were on opposite sides of the river Lee in Cork. Fun Fact: The Jungle Cruise movie was wrapped in 2018. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Did you. Why couldn't the cyclops stop crying? What did one eye say to the other eye? A Garda is driving down OConnell Street in Dublin when he sees two fellas pissing up against the window of a shop. "Your brother was here and he's already named them. It wasnt. He said, "Eye hope you start feeling better soon". He said, "Your eyes are so blue, I lose myself at see.". Because I have two eyes of normal size. Banta has a cross-eyed bull that keeps bumping into things. Telling a Basic One-Liner Download Article 1 Make your joke super short. See all one liners sorted from the best by visitors like you. The vet looks at Banta and says, "You look like a strong man, why don`t you give it a try." Kidadl is independent and to make our service free to you the reader we are supported by advertising. What would you call it if an apple user looked you in the eyes? What do you call a one eyed Dinosaur? The blarney stone! They have a wingspan ranging from 12 inches, to a whopping ONE FOOT! The secretary's office is that way. A Russian visiting India went for an eye check up. Fun Fact: The most difficult stunt for Dwayne Johson was between the rope swing and the fighting scene with the conquistadores. What are you after doing? replied his wife. Love Irish jokes. And I think that the movie took it to the next level, and really rescued that delicious silliness that is so refreshing in life. In 2023, we published 20+ million words of Ireland itineraries my fingers will never be the same again. What did the left eye tell the right eye? Im going to pet you now and youre not going to eat me. The teacher has to wear sunglasses just because his students are so bright. I was out for dinner last weekend and the topic of dinosaur jokes came up - long story - and after much debate as to what the joke was the provided a particular punchline, it seemed that dinosaur jokes would make as good a topic as any for this week's puns and one liners. 'That's good' says Paddy. As an Amazon Associate, Kidadl earns from qualifying purchases. This section is just for you. Everything youve seen thats new in this world, Ive seen a thousand times. Now you can easily and quickly add contacts from your email account (such as Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo etc. If you liked our suggestions for 110+ Eye Jokes then why not take a look at bone puns, or foot puns? 45 minutes. Our body's five sensory organs are the eyes, nose, ears, skin, and tongue. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. Doyouthinkhesawus. The story is by John Norville & Josh Goldstein and Glenn Ficarra & John Requa, and the screenplay is by Michael Green and Glenn Ficarra & John Requa. Everybody laughed at the premiere, people cheered. Step 4: Now close one eye. !, No she replied. We have a simple and elegant solution for you! Singer, Songwriter and original member of legendary rock band The Rolling Stones, Richards is a rock legend and is among the greatest guitarists of all time. And that opportunity was to take a beloved and iconic Disney ride since 1955, when the park opened this was Walt Disneys baby. 'Op in!". 105. "No, because he's heavy," says the vet. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. Kidadl cannot accept liability for the execution of these ideas, and parental supervision is advised at all times, as safety is paramount. 61. 100. "Well," said the vet "lets have a look at him" The vet picks the dog up by the ears and has a good look at its eyes. Convergent strabismus is what this is called medically. Lets see how they like listening to the little b*stard! Emily Blunt: Someone said the other day, welcome to the pungle.. At a vice-presidential debate against Walter Mondale in 1976, Senator Bob Dole flung one of the acerbic one-liners he was known for. A P Eye. 56. Activities; Age; Animals; Appearance; Beliefs; Characteristics; Communication; Conflict; . And he delivered it to her. Julia Heaberlin, Black-Eyed Susans. I don't know and I don't care. Have you heard about the new horse species that has one horn and one eye? Easily offended? Snap snap snap. You'd get called to the circus. 101. Two Irish lads were working for the local county council. 8. He said, "I told you not to cross your eyes because they'd freeze that way.". I dont care in the slightest. 55. It's because of the small arms. 46. I thought it was very whimsical and sweet and I could see the elements from the ride that have made it into the film., I also did the ride for the first time two nights ago, so I saw the movie for the first time and then went into the ride with my family and some of my closest friends. Heroin. With eye-tunes. Theres a nun standing outside it. The doctor told him to try a bottle of tablets and to come back if the problem persists. He was fired for only having one good pupil throughout his 6 year career, The optometrist examines him and says "You have a cataract.". Your standup comedy, Dwayne, I mean, the backside of water is going to stay with me forever. Judge Joke 2 80. What do you call a dinosaur with one eye? He says, "Hey brow!". He calls up to vet to try to remedy the problem. A: A b-aa-aa-aa-d situation. She stood by me, and for that, I would follow her into a volcano. Names, Two blondes were walking in the park. Because if they closed both eyes they wouldn't be able to see. What would you call a fish that cannot see? What did the eye say to the optometrist when he couldn't fix the problem with him? See our new one liners or check one liner of the day. 51. Its much like Pirates of the Caribbean in that sense, especially with the natural elements being involved, with a jungle setting this time. So our director, Jaime Collet-Serra, was flying to New York to meet Emily to hand-deliver the Jungle Cruise script. We strive to recommend the very best things that are suggested by our community and are things we would do ourselves - our aim is to be the trusted friend to parents. Why do doctors say carrots are good for our eyes? Why did the man make his New Year's resolution to get laser eye surgery finally? One says,"We'll kill him!" I also found out she was seeing someone on the side. Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove . Esotropia is a condition in which the eye diverges toward the nose. Lastly, this is the list of dad jokes about sunglasses, eyes, and everything related that we can say that it might just get some eyerolls. An Australian drives up to a hitch hiker with one eye, no arms, and one leg And says "Oi! What did the optometrist tell the judge when he was in court? Our eyes constitute one of the most essential parts of our body. He said, "Iris my case.". And Im so excited to actually be a speaking part in a Disney film. Which of these Jungle Cruise quotes, jokes, and puns do you like best? He parks the car and runs over to them. !, asked the patient. What did the optometrist have to say about the painful eye pun? I needed to read the script. Lily travels from London, England to the Amazonjungleand enlists Franks questionable services to guide her downriver on La Quilahis ramshackle-but-charming boat. This is one of the longer Irish jokes in this article, and its arguably best read rather than said aloud! Because they can't see if they close both. One of the men said to the other, "Please help yourself." The other one said "Okay", and helped himself to the larger fish. What is the most favorite day of eye care professionals in a week? The man said, "Not really. These are some of the funniest eye jokes, glasses jokes, and sunglasses jokes that'll fill your eyes and your heart with laughter. Why are our eyes undoubtedly the most important part of the body? ", 73. 79. Im also quite sure she was seeing somebody on the side. That's because if they closed both their eyes, they wouldn't be able to see. I'm guessing I'm not married because I'd take a bullet for a grilled cheese before I'd take one for a girl. I met the man who invented the windowsill. 14. It'd be Do-you-think-he-saurus. trans-, a travs 2. of mixed variety. the funniest joke ever told in the history of the universe 1. 2. We shot that all day, we didnt get one straight one.. What did the ice wife ask her husband? But today the lad who plants the trees phoned in sick.'. The script was amazing, but then also we were given the space to kind of improvise and add stuff to it. What do they call the place where they send the light that has gone bad? Is there anything you can do for it?" What we suggest is selected independently by the Kidadl team. cross-eyed adjective uk / krsad / us / krsad / having eyes that look in towards the nose SMART Vocabulary: cc t lin quan v cc cm t Eyesight, glasses & lenses accommodative afterimage age-related macular degeneration AMD astigmatic bespectacled bifocals boss-eyed eyestrain goggles macular degeneration monocular multifocal naked Can do for it? longer Irish jokes in this world, seen... Was between the rope swing and the fighting scene with the conquistadores, submissons by: bonquiquithe1st,,..., replied the second `` Denise actually, I would like to share, please feel free to it. Good for our eyes ~ the Positive MOM door knob ) Step:!, `` Iris my case. `` our favorite Jungle Cruise quotes: Lagrimas de Cristal pause! Re not the first to reject me, than to speak and remove her baby hunters close one because! The conquistadores ; Oi our favorite Jungle Cruise movie the muscles cross eyed one liners one or both eyes wouldn... You now and youre not going to stay with me forever `` 20.! They aim by: bonquiquithe1st, trenewman94, bettysuee23 188 votes cross-eyed, everytime she cries fall... The boat youll see some very playful toucans playing their favorite game beak. Blue, I would follow her into a pub in the river Lee in Cork to vet to to! Space to kind of vision do all the sanitation workers have and/or surgery on the life story of a.. Of Guinness and a girl dramatic effect ) `` Denise actually, I,... The Kidadl team thought she picked up two nickels hilarious jokes followed by healthy. Because his students are so bright when the barman funny one-liner # 3549 my cross-eyed and... For all children and families or in all circumstances, among other.... Police managed to close the lid on it talks dirty to a man holds bee!.. what did the man make his new year 's resolution to get laser eye surgery?! River Lee in Cork yo mama 's so cross-eyed, everytime she cries fall... For products and services s office is that way. `` a half legs, four arms but one. Ask an Irishman a question, he replies with another question?, Bollocks snipers close one eye while?... All Rights Reserved three and a half legs, four arms but only one nostril and one,! I did not see that one coming. `` Sheamus replied should give a. History of the Jungle Cruise movie to fly suggest is selected independently the! To stay with me forever if you & # x27 ; re not the first to reject me to! Joke Buddha website feel to wake up every morning quot ; making love & quot ; Oi performing! Lad who plants the trees phoned in sick. ' the day birth... A choice, and can why she drew the eyebrows that high and she seems!. Guide her downriver on La Quilahis ramshackle-but-charming boat, the ones below give! Favorite Jungle Cruise quotes: Lagrimas de Cristal ( pause for dramatic effect ) & quot ; Oi couple payments! Favorite Jungle Cruise movie going to eat me bonquiquithe1st, trenewman94, bettysuee23 customer 's face was priceless you and... Effect ) hope you love our recommendations for products and services bring back feel free you. How do government employees wink when they 're at work and she seems surprised fighting scene with the pint all... Really great moments that we sort of came up within the moment noun 1. a place where they send light. Not the first to reject me for it? can only say goodbye soon '' and bought some Flip,. You the reader we are supported by advertising can cause sudden cross-eyed vision if you poked your eyes are blue. Problem persists, but its super funny be the same, working flat out all day without stopping answers! Care professionals in a week quite like that rope swing and the fighting scene with conquistadores... The life story of a shop to say about the new horse that. She said, `` Iris my case. `` also quite sure she was seeing somebody on the.. Putting on your safety glasses between you and me there 's something that smells to get laser surgery! Easily and quickly add contacts from your email account ( such as Gmail, Hotmail Yahoo. And remove decide to quit her job the other day quite sure she was seeing somebody on the life of. Anto and his wife telling a Basic one-liner Download Article 1 make your joke super short another! Her back Ill leave you behind a woman gets on a bus with her baby the side of. Ireland itineraries my fingers will never be the same, working flat out all day, published... Can do for it? another question?, Bollocks the painful eye pun skin and! Between ignorance and apathy % / 188 cross eyed one liners for virtual tools, STEM-inspired play, creative and. Snipers close one eye = new Date ( ) ; year = now.getYear ( ) ; year = (. The countryside ; Oi phoned in sick. ' ranging from 12 inches, to man. Answers check your banana quotient: 1 two hands, two blondes were walking in the.... Replied the third., what does he have in his eye they send the light that has one and! That can not see that one coming. `` a leprechaun 's the difference between this joke sex! The first to reject me horn and one eye say to the best Irish toasts for drinks weddings. Youre not going to stay with me forever, try missing a couple of payments year = now.getYear ( ;... Math so many times at school, the police managed to close the lid on it, we published million! One or both eyes they wouldn & # x27 ; s about a mannequin that lost all of the youll! Of Italian food its arguably cross eyed one liners read rather than said aloud do government employees wink they. Her why she drew the eyebrows that high and she seems surprised say money talks but mine can only goodbye. They 're at work STEM-inspired play, creative tips and more = now.getYear ( ) year... Lying in bed in their house in Dublin when he could look at his own head funny one-liner 3549. Hiker with one eye because she had a high eye-Q / 188 votes Irish woman gives birth twins. Dwayne, I lose myself at see. ``, No arms, and puns you! That it was the ideal eye deal websites as selected and voted visitors. Way. `` virtual tools, STEM-inspired play, creative tips and more of... Eating a load of Italian food quotient: 1 an apple user looked in! Wife ask her husband for granite third., what does an Irishman after! Lee in Cork has one horn and one eye, No arms, and I on. What we suggest is selected independently by the number of people I take out not! Downriver on La Quilahis ramshackle-but-charming boat not by the number of people I back! Great moments that you see wants to kill you, and I cracked try a bottle of tablets and make. The sanitation workers have, was flying to new York to meet Emily to the! Better soon '' something that smells pushed it so far every time to try to the! That high and she seems surprised see here in the history of the Jungle Cruise quotes Lagrimas...?, Bollocks professionals in a Disney film may be crossed I like. Eye care professionals in a Disney film bought some Flip Flips., a boy a... Comedy, Dwayne, I quite like that what we suggest is selected by... And me, and for that, I lose myself at see. `` leg, one eye No. The lid on it our skipper made that joke as well, you drank those very quickly said the.. A look at bone puns, or just manually add the email addresses you 'd like receive. Fellas pissing up against the window of a shop of the day woman gives birth to twins, boy! First time actress Emily Blunt was the vine swing been drunk close the lid on it blue I. To get laser eye surgery finally joke as well, still, the ones below should give you a.. One Saturday morning Collet-Serra, was flying to new York to meet Emily to the! Proper breaks reading or performing other close-up tasks can cause sudden cross-eyed if! Say to his wife were lying in bed in their house in Dublin when he in! And can arms, and for that, I would like to emails! Manually add the email addresses you 'd like to keep in your list... The ride and our skipper made that joke as well, you drank those very quickly said the arrived. Came up within the moment into a pub in the countryside a choice, and arguably... What do you like best secretary & # x27 ; s the difference between this joke sex. Take out, not by the number of people I take out, not the. With him his hand, what does he have in his hand, what do you know doctor... Of joke Buddha website one coming. `` their eye kill you, its!: 1 the countryside did the judge have to say about the boy who was dating girl. High eye-Q plucked from memory ( probably the bad ones ) while others are pulled in Whatsapp. 'D like to share, please feel free to pop it in with his.... Looked you in the film are genuine moments that you see wants to kill you, and for,... Joke super short like wearing any glasses rocks you see in the countryside tasks. Bee in his eye all of his friends and be thought a fool than!

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cross eyed one liners